sir hes making progress in his lifts hes about to - /fit/

Anonymous09/14/26, 23:33No.77517036

>Sir, he's making progress in his lifts. He's about to make it. >Tendon injury. One month.

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Replies

Anon09/14/26, 23:37No.77517041

>Sir, he's motivated for a workout. He's heading to the gym right now. >Hit him with a wave of fatigue. Activate shoulder ache.

Anon09/14/26, 23:39No.77517046

Stay in your vegan thread thread, loser.

Anon09/14/26, 23:41No.77517049

>Sir, he's curling in the squat rack. >Based.

Anon09/14/26, 23:46No.77517055

>Sir, he just hit a PR. >Let it ride. >He's PRed again. He thinks he's gonna make it. >Plateau. Send him back on a 3 month deload.

Anon09/14/26, 23:52No.77517064

>Sir, he's cutting. He's been going strong a 5 days now. >Send up the McDonald's commercial. >He's resisting. >KFC. Papa John's. >He's about to crack. He's having some peanut butter. >Hit him with the Krispy Kreme. Mega savings deal. >He's getting in the car.

Anon09/14/26, 23:54No.77517066

>cut off his centerlink >now have a rope fall out of truck bed right in front of his (mother's) house.

Anon09/15/26, 00:04No.77517074

>Sir, he's at the gym. He's in the rack. >Send in the zoomers. >He's ignoring them. >Have them pull out their phones and livestream. >He's pushing through. >Gym bunnies! Indians! >He's still lifting strong. >MOG HIM! SEND IN THE ROID GROID!

Anon09/15/26, 01:00No.77517152

>hes about to go to the gym >have a colleague call him on teams

Anon09/15/26, 01:03No.77517157

>move his parents to australia >Now have his dad rape him until he's a dysfunctional retard

Anon09/15/26, 01:08No.77517167

>make him paranoid anytime someone mentions Australia or trannies

Anon09/15/26, 01:10No.77517170

>just make sure to avoid the saunas.

Anon09/15/26, 01:24No.77517193

goddamn I hate this so much, whenever I reach a new PR or get back to a previous level of fitness, some bullshit is bound to happen, like more grueling tasks at the job, a family member passes away, my body decides to go retard and pull the wrong muscle while working out, or other bullshit happens in life that keeps me away from the gym, drains my energy, kills my appetite, then sets my body back a few months.

Anon09/15/26, 01:49No.77517249

>Sir, he's wiped after just two sets. He's thinking about calling it. >Hold. Remind him that it's the weekend tomorrow, let him think he can take it easy. >He's taking a longer rest. He's pushing through. He's going for another set. >Less reps! Grind to failure! >He doesn't care! He's going all in!

Anon09/15/26, 04:23No.77517468

Lmao

Anon09/15/26, 06:45No.77517609

Anon09/15/26, 08:58No.77517734

>overuse back tear >6 months ACTIVATE

Anon09/15/26, 09:07No.77517740

Thanks, bros. I used the endorphins from laughing at this thread to push out one more set.

Anon09/15/26, 10:59No.77517818

>>Tendon injury. One month. i hate this so much, i feel like my tendons got so much weaker since i hit 30

Anon09/15/26, 11:44No.77517853

>Tendon injury Niggee that's a thread about me specifically How do I make that bitch heal faster?

Anon09/15/26, 14:00No.77518048

>Sir, he's trained and ready for his first pro mma bout. His dream will come true. >Tear his ACL on the last week before the fight. One year. And give him opioid addiction.also >Sir, he's about to post >Make it a webp file

Anon09/15/26, 14:57No.77518131

>He's buying the Omega 3 softgels >Make it rancid and smell like fish assholes

Anon09/15/26, 15:19No.77518161

>Sir, he's motivated to lift today.>Put groups of smelly minorities talking loudly and clustered around the equipment he needs

Anon09/15/26, 17:33No.77518391

>Make him spam an imageboard for 15 years and never go outside >Now make him troon out

Anon09/15/26, 17:50No.77518423

https://desuarchive.org/fit/thread/77278478#77278484 How many times are you going to make this thread?

Anon09/15/26, 17:50No.77518425

>Sir, the subject is swol and is about to have his first sexual encounter as a result >Good. Infest the girl's pussy with yeast and let him contract a mysterious disease which will cause him to lose 60% of his gains and experience varying levels of chronic fatigue until the end of his life >B-but sir... the gains... >Do it now!

Anon09/15/26, 18:06No.77518446

>Sir, the thread's being spammed by a seething troon again. >...So?

Anon09/15/26, 18:11No.77518452

>Sir, it's Monday. He's had two whole days of rest. Should we let him feel energized and motivated? >...No.

Anon09/15/26, 19:46No.77518581

You guys are either just not funny or really don't understand the format of this meme

Anon09/15/26, 20:34No.77518653

>he’s about to break his plateau >…give him a sore throat that evolves into a life and death with the flu >undo his gains of the past 3 months

Anon09/15/26, 22:11No.77518814

Fuck I HATE my FUCKING body. Every time I succeed in fixing my routine, going to the gym regularly, eating clean and stopping the alcohol demon, something goes wrong. Anything. It's either my mental health going down the fucking drain and destroying my appetite, a shoulder / tendon killing itself because it decided to do so, or more recently a random upper back pain killing my sleep and my recovery This dumb cycle never ENDS

Anon09/15/26, 23:45No.77518940

77518901 It didn't, samefagging troon. The thread carried on as normal. Sneed.

Anon09/15/26, 23:53No.77518960

>samefagging your samefag Kek

Anon09/15/26, 23:59No.77518970

77518955 77518960 77518966 >trying this hard If only you would put as much effort into showering, samefagging troon.

Anon09/16/26, 00:06No.77518989

Let's get back to fun posting ok guys. No more trooning out talk. No more talk about spamming for 15 years and never going outside. Report any post that mentions these things. No one seethes about them but just report it, ok?

Anon09/16/26, 00:10No.77518998

He gave up replying to himself because it was too see thru kek

Anon09/16/26, 00:13No.77519005

>Sir, he's looking at accessory lifts. >Cue up the memelifts. Leg press, preacher curls, upright rows. Send him to snap city. >He's not falling for it. He's just repping out extra sets. >Post another Mike Mentzer thread. Stop him!

Anon09/16/26, 00:15No.77519011

77518998 77518989 Formerly Chuck's

Anon09/16/26, 02:00No.77519145

>sir, this is the only time he can fit a gym sess into his schedule. >fill the gym with extras. leave no machines, no racks, no benches unoccupied

Anon09/16/26, 16:14No.77520175

holy shit even this thread is now getting spammed by the same faggot

Anon09/16/26, 16:15No.77520176

>sir he's breaking his SLDL and bent over barbell row PRs like it's nothing >QL strain, NOW.

Anon09/16/26, 17:47No.77520320

>Sir, he's laughing at a funny /fit/ thread >Make some retards ruin it

Anon09/16/26, 18:17No.77520363

77520320 OP here, samefagtroon likes to convince himself he's ruining things because it's the only sense of accomplishment he can eke out of his pointless, miserable existence. But what he fails to comprehend, and never will, is that Sneed's Feed & Seed was formerly Chuck's. You see, the sign is a subtle joke.

Anon09/16/26, 21:21No.77520652

>hit the tv stand with the bottom of my foot >cut myself where toe bends and in between toe >needed stitches >hurts to walk >can't lift or run for a while

Anon09/17/26, 19:38No.77522375

1 month is merciful.

Anon09/17/26, 19:47No.77522390

>>Sir, he's making progress in his lifts. Motivated. Diet on point. High energy. He's about to make it. >>Lay him off from his job.

Anon09/18/26, 18:53No.77523996

>sar, our daily spam thread is getting no responses on /tv/ anymore >just post it on /fit/ again

Anon09/18/26, 19:48No.77524083

>sir, he just added 20lbs to his squat, at this rate 4pl8 is inevitable >pull the muscles and pinch his lower back nerves while he is warming up, do not let him put weight on that bar, fix it by monday and fill the squat racks with roasties so he does something else

Anon09/18/26, 20:14No.77524106

>Sir he is doing bjj and actually beginning to "get it"...>Okay have him wake up with random numbness in his tricep along with shooting pain>Sir, he is still training>Quick get that blue belt to guillotine and sprawl his neck into his asshole giving him multiple bulging disks>*3 months later*>Sir, he is training again>He is still training>Okay make sure everyone cranks his neck again so his neck and shoulder blade hurts all the time and he can't sleep

Anon09/19/26, 16:40No.77525290

>sir he finally worked up the courage to talk to a pretty girl he saw in public, he even got her phone number >trigger a manic episode and make him spam 10 paragraphs at 3 am so she tells him she's a lesbian the next morning

Anon09/19/26, 20:26No.77525544

>Send a gym bunny in shorts his way. >He's looking at her ass, sir. >Zap his brain with the crossdressing fantasies. >Sir, he's headed to the toilet stall. >Perfect.

Anon09/19/26, 21:29No.77525613

>For God's sake, Chris! The whole world is watching. We can't let him snap in front of a live audience!

Anon09/19/26, 23:44No.77525760

>Palms sweaty >Knees weak, arms heavy. >Sir, he's shadowboxing.

Anon09/20/26, 05:30No.77526138

>sir, he got a new job offer in a lucrative positions, free gym membership too, year round >its toronto