i have these emotional highs where i just feel

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Anonymous09/07/26, 21:52No.34901770
I have these emotional highs where I just feel incredible and motivated and I have tons of energy to do everything. I feel super productive and great. Then I have these lows that kind of come out of nowhere, and it feels like nothing matters. I barely want to get out of bed, I skip meals because eating feels pointless, so on. I get upset easily, I hate things I normally like. I got diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, and my husband took it as a big relief because now the medication is supposed to help me avoid those lows, but I don't get those bursts of energy and feeling great when I'm on the medication either. I feel like these meds are crippling my personality into something muted and acceptable to society, because the way I feel when I have all that energy is the person I want to think of as myself. My husband treats it like I'm hurting myself by skipping my meds, because I started taking them only when I feel down and he keeps complaining they "don't work that way" which I know but it's easy for him to say than when he's not the one experiencing all this. I don't feel like there's any kind of reality where I can get him or anybody to understand the way I feel here, and it's so fucking isolating that I'm afraid of just giving in to the pressure from everyone, taking the pills, and losing myself into being this emotionally stable but dull person.
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Replies

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Anon09/08/26, 00:20No.34902135
LARP. Bipolar disorder is the one where you think you're a bunch of different people in one body.
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Anon09/08/26, 01:11No.34902229
how many times have you cheated on him?
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Anon09/08/26, 01:32No.34902291
>feel like these meds are crippling my personality into something muted and acceptable to society Because that's the intended effect and may cause permanent change too. Ask your psych to wane them for some time and try to do things that keep you low stress, motivated and happy for the longest time possible. To to a therapist and don't dwell on negative thoughts. GL.
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Anon09/08/26, 04:11No.34902615
Just take your fucking pills. You're making your husband miserable forcing him to deal with a depression you could medicate away RIGHT NOW.